People tend to assume that narcissists are self-serving and vindictive individuals. Still, in reality, they are experiencing extremely low self-esteem and shame. Narcissists rely on the validation they receive from others. When they suddenly lose that supply, narcissists experience an emotional breakdown, often called a narcissistic collapse. Although there hasn’t been much research regarding this matter, narcissistic collapse is an avenue for expanding our knowledge concerning narcissism.
The narcissistic collapse also removed the stigma of narcissism, which people thought of as shallow. This is the chance for people to see narcissists’ deep-rooted feelings, which will soon lead them to see that narcissists are humans too.
Today, if you are one of those people willing to see a narcissist’s vulnerability, stay with me until the end, as I am about to discuss 10 things that would happen during a narcissistic collapse.
We are stressed and hurt.
People frequently stereotype narcissists as people who go through life without a care in the world. Those who do not experience any hurt or stress—yes, narcissists have inflated egos, but those things aren’t susceptible to pain. It may not be as obvious in overt narcissists, but it can be transparent in introverted narcissists.
Although no matter the type, narcissists will feel the same emotions, they will only differ in how they react to them. For example, introverted narcissists are the ones who just sit in a corner, waiting for someone to notice them. When no one comes to them as expected, they will go into turmoil; they will be filled with stress and hurt over nothing particular, and most of the time they will direct that toward other people or themselves.
The stress and hurt they will feel will also cause them to cry out in frustration, and that frustration is often just preventing them from functioning well, causing them a lot of stress because they will be unable to control themselves and suck it up.
What Is a Narcissistic Collapse?
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highlights emotional pain and weakness.
When you suddenly feel an emotion unfamiliar to you and can’t explain it in words, narcissists have a strong need to control their emotions, but we can’t have everything we want, right? What do you usually do to deal with the frustration of not understanding yourself? A narcissist’s sense of superiority coaxes them into believing that they are someone of importance and should be catered to by people no matter where they go, and when that expectation isn’t acknowledged, they will feel humiliated, doubtful of themselves, and overly insecure. These emotions will make a narcissist feel emotional pain. usually related to underlying selfish needs. A narcissistic collapse will unravel all the narcissists’ weaknesses because, underneath the displays of superiority and sense of entitlement, they often feel empty, powerless, and shameful, which they perceive as weakness.
Rage
A narcissistic collapse also causes narcissists to feel overwhelming rage. Earlier, I asked how you would react to an unfamiliar emotion you couldn’t explain. When it comes to narcissists, rage is often a default reaction. The feeling of not being able to pinpoint what they are feeling is frustrating for them and even for ordinary people, but what differentiates us from narcissists is that we can compose ourselves alone, and narcissists can’t do that. The only way they can let their rage go is to lash out, make a mess in the room, or act out all of a sudden. They may shout out of nowhere just to get that rage out of their system. And the most unfortunate thing is that they might turn into bullies or psychopaths if they can’t find stability again, or, worse, they will find stability by hurting other people physically.
7 Things That Will Happen During Narcissistic Rage
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Impulsive reactions
During a narcissistic collapse, narcissists are still left feeling as if they have lost their confidence and hard-earned facade or pretense. What will be your instant reaction if something threatens to take away something you’ve worked hard for? Isn’t it for protection?Narcissists are also like that; the symptoms of narcissistic collapse are essentially when their narcissistic traits become overly pronounced. Narcissists are known to be impulsive even at the beginning; they prioritize short-term gains and quick decisions to protect their self-image and still appear confident and appealing to others, but the rage they feel when their world crumbles will fuel their impulsiveness as they desperately try to reclaim their fantasy of controlling their emotions and others. As a result, their instincts will instantly kick in, leading them to make clumsy decisions that often cause a plot hole in their made-up stories. Either way, narcissists will still be knocked over when they experience a narcissistic collapse, no matter how hard they try to get it together.
Withdrawal
According to what I’ve said before, introverted narcissists are translucent when they experience a narcissistic collapse. You may ask why it is only them. It’s because overt or grandiose narcissists take the position of a leader or someone above them that they are seldom questioned or looked down upon. How do we notice an introverted narcissist is experiencing a narcissistic collapse? That is when you see them withdrawing from a conversation or ghosting you; this passive-aggressive behavior is a narcissist’s way of gaining back the control they have over you or a situation. They might even expect your attention to make them feel good again, even if you didn’t do anything to offend them or don’t have a reason to pursue them.
5 effective ways that make a narcissist panic
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negative projection
Yes, even if narcissists are at the end of their control. When they experience a narcissistic collapse, they will still have a way to gaslight you. After all, that is their specialty: convincing you that it is your fault when, in fact, it is their fault.The other thing they would do, aside from blaming you, is to project their negative emotions onto you. Suppose you’re having a great night, and then your partner suddenly acts out when they come home from work and starts to shout how useless you are for watching TV and having fun all day. Their stress and anger from the collapse might have come from work, but because they see you having a good laugh, they want you to be miserable, just like them. For narcissists, if they go down, you must also go down.
intense thirst for revenge
If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, you will know they have a simple mindset when someone attacks them. “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth” is an understatement. Narcissists hold grudges for quite a long time; they will obliterate those who dare to offend them. When their rage and impulses heighten, their first impulse to bleed also goes to the root. If you’re responsible for the reason for their collapse, then you must expect them to get back at you. After all, narcissists are obsessed with taking control of people. So, if you’ve taken the challenge for their throne, you’re up for a bloodbath.
compulsive Behavior
Narcissists also try their best to distract themselves when they experience a collapse. After all the gaslighting, victim blaming, and manipulation, Narcissists also have the urge to direct their attention to Gambling, drinking, or using drugs are the common vices that usually cause them to be irritable. Narcissists seek pleasure in all sorts of ways, and substance abuse is quite famous for most of them. I mean, why would they pass on feeling happy and ecstatic? For someone who can’t feel genuine happiness, drugs might be their only taste of joy.
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Depression
According to LAPA, experiencing narcissistic collapse may feel similar to experiencing an episode of depression. An article also stated that narcissists feel anxiety and depression that keep them from getting out of bed and functioning at an ordinary level, whatever is normal in their context. At this point, narcissists will succumb to their negative thoughts, which causes them to lean on other ways to regain control, and this usually leads narcissists to turn to the next point: self-harm.
self-harm
When narcissists experience a breakdown, they often resort to self-harm or suicide. The intent behind it is usually one of two things: to get attention from their victims or to punish themselves. Narcissistic collapse is terrifying for both the person involved and those around them; they don’t know what to believe anymore, and they may become suicidal or begin hallucinating. When experiencing a narcissistic mental breakdown, the narcissist can become dangerous and violent. In those cases, you’ll need professional assistance unless you can simply walk away. To have someone as unstable as narcissists in their normal state suffer a collapse is to create chaos. If you see the signs, you might want to distance yourself from them and save yourself.
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