*They will accuse you of doing things that you absolutely did not do. And this can come in a few different forms. So, the narcissist may accuse you of being a narcissist. They may accuse you of gaslighting. And they may overreact and exaggerate your behavior to accuse you of something that you’re not really doing. This one is hard to believe until you actually experience it. But it kind of reminds me of the scene in a movie where somebody starts screaming, ‘Why you’re touching me?’ when the other person isn’t really touching them. It’s like they’re trying to make a scene and call attention to something that’s not actually happening.
But so, in a conversation, it might look a little something like this. Let’s say you’re divorcing a narcissist, and you’re having a conversation about custody. These conversations are never fun, no matter who you’re talking to. But when you’re talking to a narcissist, it is especially difficult. So, you’re trying to keep things civil. You’re trying to be fair because you don’t want to fight, and you want what’s best for the kids. So, you’re just discussing things. There are no decisions being made. You’re just talking about what you want and what they want.
All of a sudden, they start screaming that you’re taking the kids away from them. You’re going to leave town, and they’re never going to see the kids again. It goes from here to here with no real explanation or input from you. They’ve just decided that you’re doing this thing, and now you have to defend yourself. Now you have to explain that you’re not doing this thing at all. If you’re dealing with a narcissist, this is a manipulation tactic, and it often leads to a smear campaign. False accusations are very much meant to intimidate you because you naturally start thinking about what other people would think if they believed this ridiculous lie.
6. The smear campaign.
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