It is completely wrong to say that a narcissistic relationship begins with love; it does not. It begins with predatory testing. Before choosing you as their primary source of supply, a narcissist thoroughly tests you for qualities like compassion, kindness, acceptance, forgiveness, empathy, and so on. They also look for your past trauma. They want to know if you have wounds or patterns, like people-pleasing, that can be weaponized against you. But how do they test people? What do they do? Let’s find out in today’s article.
1. Boundary Testing: Disrespectful Comments
They will make a disrespectful comment about something small, like your job, money, car, shoes, dress, kids, work, family, or friends. It won’t be too big—just something insignificant that most people would ignore. However, their intention is to test your boundaries. They want to see your bodily reactions. If you’re a people pleaser, you will absorb it and start trying to be nice to them to avoid being abandoned, left, or rejected because of your perceived flaws. Predators will observe your silence. If you don’t say anything, they will perceive your silence as permission to abuse you further. They might insult you in a joking way, saying, “We’re just kidding!” If you react, they may call you crazy or apologize, realizing you cannot be played with. This is why you must not tolerate any disrespectful behavior, no matter the intention. If they comment on something personal, like your appearance or possessions, they are testing how deep they can go.
2. Manipulation Through Change
Narcissists Will Lose their Minds if You Do These 10 Things
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