Of course, a narcissist will never admit this because it would shatter their helpless victim identity and threaten their control over you. Understanding that narcissistic behavior is rooted in a deep-seated need to manipulate and dominate others can help you see that their actions are about sustaining their self-esteem and fulfilling their needs without regard for your well-being.
3. Acknowledging Their Lack of Empathy
In this make-believe world, you might hear:
“For just a moment, I’ll try to sincerely put myself in your shoes and imagine what it must have felt like to be strung along for such a long period in such a chaotic and one-sided relationship. But wait—I can’t feel any empathy, especially toward men I’m romantically involved with. Of course, I’m good at acting like I care to keep my mask intact, but any empathy I genuinely feel is reserved for me, myself, and I.”
You will never hear this from a narcissist because acknowledging their lack of empathy would force them to confront the false image they’ve constructed of themselves as endlessly misunderstood victims. Understanding that they lack the capacity for true empathy, guilt, or remorse can help you let go of expecting them to change.
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