The narcissist will compliment you and make you feel good when it serves their interests, but they will also criticize and belittle you when it benefits them. Their actions and words often have nothing to do with you; rather, they reflect their own insecurities and needs. If you can detach yourself emotionally from their words—both the positive and the negative—you will find it easier to maintain your self-esteem. Remember that narcissists often project their feelings onto others, so if they ever accuse you of being a narcissist, it’s likely because they feel threatened or insecure.
Tip Three: Protect Yourself.
When in a relationship with someone who has narcissistic personality disorder, it’s vital to establish strong boundaries. These boundaries are essential for protecting yourself emotionally, physically, and even legally. Keep in mind that while your boundaries may not change their behavior, they can shield you from their manipulations. It’s not uncommon for narcissists to dismiss or deflect any attempts at discussing boundaries. I once worked with a woman whose family member was taking loans out in her name and signing her name on documents without her consent. She was reluctant to take legal action against him and instead tried to reason with him, but he completely ignored the severity of his actions. If someone’s behavior crosses a line, don’t hesitate to take necessary legal steps; narcissists often don’t recognize that their actions are harmful.
Tip Four: Believe Behavior, Not Words.
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