- Observe, don’t absorb. Notice it. “Oh, there’s the silent treatment again.” Remember why they’re doing it: they want your emotions, your drama, your pain. Decide not to give them that.
- Respond without reacting. You don’t have to beg or plead. They’re allowed to be quiet if they want, but you’re allowed to stay healthy and engage in empowering behaviors. You can say, “It looks like you don’t want to talk right now, and that’s fine.”
- Focus on what you need, not on what they need. Don’t ask why they’re doing this or what you can do to stop it. Instead, ask, “What do I need right now to feel good?” Don’t let the lie of codependent thinking, that you can only be okay if they stop their toxic behavior, control you.
You are allowed to feel good. Give yourself permission. Start making these changes, and I promise you’ll shift from feeling tortured to empowered. When you stop giving the narcissist what they want, they won’t like it — but that’s okay. Share with me what you plan to do the next time the silent treatment comes around, and keep practicing until it becomes second nature.
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