Narcissists are extremely secretive and mysterious. They live double lives, hiding things from you and others because they don’t want their true selves to be known. Why? If their real identity were exposed, they would lose the power they hold over others. Control would slip away, and they would be revealed.
When we think of their secretive behavior, things like their phones or insecurities might come to mind. But today, we won’t focus on the obvious. We’ll discuss some of the deeper things narcissists hide to create a new identity.
Secret #1: Health Issues
Narcissists go to great lengths to hide their health issues. Why? Because they want to appear perfect and powerful. To them, having health problems is a sign of weakness, and they see themselves as the alpha, the predator, the one in control. To maintain this image, they refuse to show vulnerability.
This is particularly true for overt, grandiose, and malignant narcissists. In contrast, covert narcissists may openly display their suffering. But a grandiose or malignant narcissist will insist they’re perfectly fine, even if they’re clearly struggling. For instance, if you point out that they’re limping, they might respond, “What are you talking about? I’m perfectly fine. Look at me—I’m strong and capable of things you could only dream of.”
Despite their outward bravado, they may suffer from severe health anxiety or even delusional paranoia about minor health issues. I’ve witnessed this with my own father. Though he pretends to be the healthiest man in the family, he’s deeply paranoid about his blood sugar levels and other small details most of us wouldn’t even notice.
When faced with a major health issue, such as a serious illness, a narcissist may retreat from others. Their sense of power disappears, and they hide because being vulnerable terrifies them. And when others around them get sick, they offer no empathy—illness disgusts them because it reminds them of their own vulnerabilities.
Secret #2: Age
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