Ghosting is a term that’s gained popularity in recent years, but the concept itself isn’t new. People have been “disappearing” on others for centuries, leaving relationships without explanation or closure. Today, however, ghosting is more common and normalized, largely due to our increasing reliance on online interactions. This shift in communication has reduced accountability in relationships, making it easier for people to cut ties without facing the emotional fallout. But why do people ghost, and how can you deal with the emotional pain it causes?
Why Do People Ghost?
Ghosting can be motivated by various factors, but two primary reasons stand out:
- Fear of Conflict or Pain: For some, ghosting is an avoidance strategy. They may perceive that any engagement with you will lead to discomfort, conflict, or emotional pain. For example, they may feel you’re someone who’s difficult to communicate with or someone who doesn’t listen, leading them to decide it’s easier to disappear than face a potential confrontation.
- Passive-Aggressive Power Move: In other cases, ghosting can be used as a form of control, punishment, or emotional cruelty. Some people withdraw as a way to exercise control over a relationship, similar to stonewalling or the silent treatment. This tactic is often intended to hurt the other person emotionally, and it’s considered a form of emotional abuse.
However, it’s important to recognize that ghosting has a separate category when used as a self-protective measure in abusive relationships. In these cases, cutting off contact is often a necessary and life-saving step rather than a tactic to avoid responsibility or hurt someone.
Why Ghosting Hurts So Much
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