Dealing with a narcissist isn’t always as simple as leaving, moving on and focus on yourself. Sometimes things are pretty complex, especially when that narcissist happens tobe your parent, boss, co-worker, or the coparent, the other parent of your children.In such a case, you have to face them.You have to use certain tricksand techniques to stay two steps ahead, and that is what I’m goingto teach you in this episode
Chapter 1: Drip Supply – Controlling Validation
Number one, offer them drip supply.What is drip supply?It is intermittent supply.You do not have to give them all thevalidation, admiration, praise, orwhatever it is you know they want fromyou at once, because if you do that, theywon’t be thirsty, they won’t come back,and that means you will get tortured.You will have to selectively, and onpurpose, consciously fawn, to give thema little tiny teeny piece of your heart.of what they want so that you canchange their behavior in a desired way.An example of this could becomplimenting them in specific areasyou know they care a lot about.Maybe it’s their job, it’s their hobby,something else they are interested in.You do not want to do anything withany of those things, I understandit, but you have to fake it.You’re dealing with a lie.And you cannot just be yourself all thetime and expect them to respect that.Of course not.And this person is blind to your reality.They only are looking forthe confirmation of theirs.They’re always looking for the validation.of the fact that they are a great humanbeing, they are better than others.So you have to put them ona pedestal, but not always.You have to do it when you know doingit will get you a desired behavior.Let’s say they are behaving nicely.They’re behaving in a wayyou want them to behave.That’s when you praise them, notincessantly, but here and there inbits and pieces as I explained earlier.What would that do?That would condition their brainto behave in that way, which willsend signals across that if I wereto act this way, speak this way,I will get more of that supply.You will nod.You will give them a happy face.You will listen.You will orient your body in theirdirection showing them that you arereceptive and open to their ideas.But when they’re not behaving inacceptable ways, you do the opposite.You withhold supply.You do not make eye contact.You do not respond.You do the extreme form of stonewalling.and greyrocking.What will that do?That will push the narcissistin secure self to behave inways that will get you going.Somehow make them think that thething you want to happen is whatthey want to happen as well.Or your decision should be their decision.They should think it’s coming from them.Introduce it as an idea.Oh, I was thinking about all theoptions that you chose and I thinkthey’re great and this one is the best.Just make it all about them.They need to win.They need to have the upper hand.They need to select and choose foreverybody because their grandioseself tells them They know the best.
Chapter 2: Using Their Image Against Them
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