Among all the triggers that massively impact a narcissist and momentarily shatter their ego, sounds top the list.
Certain sounds can cause a narcissist to fall apart. They lose control, throw tantrums, and rage. These sounds can trigger you and me as well, but the reasons for their reaction are entirely different. That’s what we’ll explore in this episode.
Disclaimer:
The sounds discussed here can also trigger survivors of complex trauma. However, just because you find one of these sounds triggering doesn’t mean you’re a narcissist. The difference lies in why you are triggered. Stay until the end to understand this more deeply.
1. Deep Sigh: A Narcissist’s Worst Nightmare
The sound of someone sighing in exasperation can really put a narcissist on edge. Why? They perceive it as a complaint or criticism.
In a narcissistic relationship—whether with a parent, partner, or someone else—there’s no space for your emotions. You’re expected to suppress your feelings and remain silent. Any expression of dissatisfaction, even a sigh, is seen as criticism.
For a narcissist, there’s no such thing as constructive feedback. If something is wrong, it must be your fault. This delusional mindset makes even a deep sigh threatening to their ego.
When you sigh out of frustration or helplessness, the narcissist scrutinizes it, interpreting it as an attack on their image. Their response? Rage. They take out their anger on you to avoid confronting their feelings of failure and guilt.
2. Crying Baby: The Narcissist’s Dilemma
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When a baby cries, a narcissist doesn’t respond like an empathetic parent. They see the crying as a nuisance, not a need to be addressed.
Narcissists want the rewards of parenthood—such as admiration and attention—but avoid the challenges. They may enjoy fun moments with a child but shun responsibilities like comforting a crying baby.
Instead of attending to the baby’s needs, they may demand that you “deal with it.” Their lack of empathy makes them incapable of connecting with their child’s distress.
By contrast, trauma survivors may also find a crying baby triggering due to sensory overload or past experiences. However, this reaction stems from trauma, not a lack of empathy.
3. Laughter: A Threat to Narcissistic Control
Laughter can trigger a narcissist for several reasons.
First, they are insecure. When they hear laughter, they may assume it’s directed at them, personalizing it as mockery. This reaction often stems from their own unresolved trauma.
Second, they are envious of happiness. A narcissist cannot stand others being joyful when they feel miserable. Their inner turmoil must match the external environment, so they impose their mood on everyone around them.
Lastly, laughter disrupts their control. Narcissists demand seriousness and obedience in their relationships. If someone laughs, they perceive it as defiance.
4. The Narcissist’s Own Voice: A Hidden Insecurity
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Most people feel uncomfortable hearing their recorded voice, but for a narcissist, it’s deeper. Hearing their own voice can evoke feelings of vulnerability or shame, which they go to great lengths to avoid.
They may project confidence, claiming their voice sounds “strong” or “composed.” However, deep down, they might hear something they find weak or inadequate.
This insecurity is similar to their aversion to eye contact. They may hide behind sunglasses, creating an air of unpredictability to mask their shame.
5. Silence: The Narcissist’s Unbearable Enemy
Silence can be unsettling for survivors of trauma because it creates uncertainty. However, for a narcissist, silence is unbearable for a different reason: it forces them to confront their inner darkness.
Without noise or distraction, a narcissist’s unresolved issues surface, overwhelming them. To avoid this discomfort, they may fill the silence with constant chatter, often without any meaningful point.
Unlike a trauma survivor who may prefer listening, a narcissist dominates the conversation to regain control.
Conclusion
Did you find this topic helpful and insightful? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below.
Thank you for joining me in this episode. Remember, healing is a journey. Let’s continue it together. See you in the next one!
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