If a narcissist values their children’s achievements for vanity, you can frame decisions to align with their ego. For instance, if you want your child to attend a specific school, instead of directly stating your preference, highlight the school’s prestige and how it benefits the child. Appeal to their delusions of grandeur, making it seem like their idea.
Example 3: Choosing Vacation Destinations
If deciding on a vacation spot leads to conflict, create a list of your preferred locations and subtly devalue options you dislike. Present the benefits of your choices in a way that appeals to their narcissistic criteria, ensuring they align with your preferences.
Sign 2: Conditioning Behavior with Drip Supply
Drip supply involves limiting the attention or “supply” you give them. Narcissists crave validation, but if it’s freely available, they lose interest. Instead, reward desirable behavior and withhold attention during undesirable actions.
Example:
When they act out, withdraw your presence, use brief responses like “okay” or “I see,” and avoid emotional engagement. This intentional gray-rocking signals that their behavior won’t yield the desired response. When they behave appropriately, acknowledge and reward them, reinforcing positive actions through operant conditioning.
Sign 3: Using Image and Reputation Against Them
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