No Man Is an Island
This quote may be overused, but it is undeniably true. Humans need to form relationships with others to survive. However, like everything else in this world, relationships are not always genuine or perfect—especially when you are dealing with a narcissist.
You need to be extra careful and learn to identify them early on, as a relationship with a narcissist is entirely dissimilar to other relationships.
Here are five stages of a relationship with a narcissist. Watch for the clues—you might already be in such a relationship.
1: The Seduction Stage
The first stage is the seduction stage. At this point, narcissists pull out all the stops to make an impression. They turn strangers into great friends and aim to woo their chosen partner.
In this phase, everything feels magical—like flowers and rainbows. The narcissistic partner showers their target with love and makes them feel incredibly special.
Ever heard of “love bombing”? This is when the narcissist tricks their target into believing they are perfect for each other. They position themselves as the missing piece that completes their partner’s life, providing romance, material luxury, or anything else the target desires.
However, all these excessive displays of affection and perfection are part of a larger plan. This is the narcissist’s way of luring the other person into dependency, masking their selfish objectives behind a facade of selflessness. Once dependence sets in, the target becomes a victim—a moth drawn to a flame, despite the dangers.
2: The Domination Stage
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In the second stage, the domination stage, the illusion of perfection begins to fade. The narcissist’s darker, true colors emerge.
This is the phase where lies and abuse take center stage. These tactics instill fear in their partner, compelling them to cater to the narcissist’s every demand. Often, victims alienate themselves from friends and family, believing the narcissist’s demands are justified.
The ideal love the narcissist initially portrayed blinds the victim. They hold on to hope, believing the initial romance can be reignited. Sadly, this hope leads to powerlessness, giving the narcissist full control.
3: The Exploitation Stage
The exploitation stage begins once the narcissist has total control.
Here, abuse becomes more severe and frequent. The victim has little choice but to comply with the narcissist’s demands, regardless of personal cost.
This is the phase where narcissists drain their partners of everything—attention, money, power, or anything else they value. They exploit their partner until there is nothing left.
In this stage, the victim realizes that the narcissist was never as loving or romantic as they seemed at first. Instead, they were manipulative, using the victim for selfish gain.
4: The Mundane Stage
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In the fourth stage, the mundane stage, the narcissist begins to lose interest.
The excitement fades, and boredom sets in. Narcissists grow tired of their partners once they have nothing left to exploit. At this point, the victim becomes invisible, receiving no attention or care from the narcissist.
This is also when the narcissist decides whether to discard their partner or continue the cycle of abuse. If they choose not to discard, the victim can expect even more suffering.
However, if they do discard the victim, it can provide a chance for freedom and escape.
5: The Termination Stage
Finally, the termination stage is when the narcissist ends the relationship.
For the narcissist, this is a fresh start, as breakups do not emotionally affect them. Instead, they quickly move on to finding a new target to exploit.
However, termination doesn’t always mean the narcissist will stay away forever. They may return to regain control, using seduction tactics or even fake emotions like begging or crying.
If you’ve been in a relationship with a narcissist and find yourself free, learn your lesson and do not return. Any promises of change are empty; their intentions are only to reassert control.
Final Thoughts
The stages described above are not exclusive to romantic relationships. They can occur in friendships, family dynamics, or any type of relationship. Narcissists can be anyone—friends, relatives, or acquaintances.
It’s essential to be mindful of your relationships and protect yourself.
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