Have you ever laughed in a serious or awkward situation? Survivors might use humor as a shield because showing negative emotions wasn’t allowed during the abuse. Psychologist Dr. Judith Orloff explains that humor can help regain control and diffuse tension, but it can also make it difficult for others to see your true feelings.
While laughter can lighten the mood, it’s essential to remember that expressing sadness or fear is okay. Your feelings are valid, and you don’t need to hide them anymore.
7. Frequent Pauses in Speech
Survivors may pause more often when they speak, not because they don’t know what to say, but because they’ve been conditioned to carefully scan their words for safety. This cautious habit, developed to avoid criticism, can persist even in comfortable settings.
To build confidence, practice speaking freely in safe environments and trust that it’s okay to express yourself without constant filtering.
8. Using Passive Language
Survivors may struggle with assertiveness, often softening their words to avoid conflict. Instead of saying, “I want” or “I need,” they might say, “Maybe we could” or “I was thinking that.” This passive language stems from a place of self-protection.
To overcome this, practice making clear and direct statements about your wants and needs. Building assertiveness can help boost confidence in communication.
9. Repeating Themselves for Clarity
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