Cease torturing yourself with the idea that someone else is receiving the love you were denied; it’s a fallacy. Implement blocking, prioritize your healing, and focus on self-love. What inevitably follows is a full-blown smear campaign. If you maintain your boundaries and resist their hoovering and the meddling of flying monkeys, they will resort to attacking your character and reputation. Narcissists are inherently bitter, resentful, and cowardly. Regardless of their own reprehensible behavior, they will portray themselves as either the hero or the victim, casting you as the villain.
Prepare yourself for this onslaught. They will attempt to manipulate others’ perceptions of you, resorting to lies, cruelty, and bizarre accusations to assassinate your character and reputation. This can be profoundly painful, especially during the early stages of healing. This underscores the importance of engaging in genuine healing work and cultivating a strong support system. Over time, you can develop resilience against this onslaught. When a narcissist can no longer control, manipulate, or exploit you directly, they attempt to control how others perceive you. Your task is to rise above the noise and remain largely, if not entirely, unaffected.
This is undoubtedly challenging, but it’s the reality of their playbook. Preparing for this worst-case scenario and prioritizing self-care are essential. By doing so, you’ll be significantly less affected by their smear tactics, regardless of who believes them.
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