Once you’ve identified a narcissist in your life, I’ve learned to treat everyone like a flying monkey, whether they’re my sister, my parents, or my friends. If my friends keep spending time with the narcissist, I may as well bid them farewell. The narcissist can use these tactics to keep tabs on you and predict when they will be most effective in contacting you, whether to violate no-contact or catch you off guard.
In the event of a loss, such as a death in the family, a breakup, or a promotion, the narcissist’s next move is to claim they’re the victim. Narcissists will try to convince you that they can’t survive without you. They may even threaten to hurt themselves or even commit suicide if you leave them or refuse to accept them back. They’re being overly manipulative here; they will make a spectacle of their desperation and helplessness to emphasize how dependent they are on you. An onslaught of apologies, pledges to change, and crocodile tears may be forthcoming if their initial attempt doesn’t work. Narcissists have no trouble shedding tears when it’s time for them to do so.
They hope that by appealing to our emotions, they might sway our decision. But you’ll just have to take my word for it: male or female, narcissists may suddenly burst into tears for no apparent reason. The tears are fake. To re-enter our lives, narcissists will say or do things designed to make us second-guess our decision to cut ties. Narcissists will say or do anything to make others feel horrible about themselves. Usually, they get what they want by appealing to our higher morals, so expect them to try to persuade you with a mix of charisma, sob stories, a winning smile, and possibly even tears.
They will resort to any means necessary to win your affection, pity, assistance, and allegiance. The narcissist is heartless and can’t feel our pain; they are simply interested in using us for their own gain. They rely on us to satisfy their narcissistic needs and boost their confidence. It’s crucial to keep your composure when confronting a narcissist who tries to re-enter your life. Don’t give in to their niceties or their phony attempts to help you. Instead, fight back.
Because of this, we may safely assume that the narcissist’s apparent kindness is insincere and that their actions are driven by ulterior motives to plunder your wealth or eliminate you altogether. They also have no qualms about using goodwill as bargaining leverage. They put on a convincing performance of sorrow and remorse.
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