Secondly, they insist on dominance and control. For narcissists to take advantage of their chosen target, they must first gain complete control over them. They will frequently try to exert their authority over every aspect of your existence. This conduct can manifest in various ways, including managing the finances, making dinner plans, deciding how your children are raised, determining where you live, and deciding whether or not you can work.
Telling the narcissist to go away is the best thing you can do for yourself—unless you don’t mind having your every move regulated. Your only option, as I presume you do, is to sever the connection. It’s not always as simple as it appears, and with children involved, it’s much more challenging. If they are an elderly family member, a coworker, or an employer, there is, however, always a way out of every situation. The path to rehabilitation begins with self-healing and recovery work, as well as establishing a strong support network. This is a team effort, and I believe none of us can do it alone.
Next, number three is crazy-making conversations and fact-twisting. In this case, the narcissist claims to have said or done something only to later deny it. Don’t fool around with your own perceptions; you are being used as a pawn in an elaborate ruse to invalidate and denigrate you, making you doubt your own sanity and vision of reality, gradually driving you insane over time.
A narcissist’s tendency to engage in mind-bending conversations usually emerges fairly quickly. As long as they can get your attention, they will drain your critical life force energy and remain entertained. The narcissist gets all the benefits; they employ nonsensical talk to keep you spinning in circles, dancing like a puppet on strings, attempting to explain and defend your position while exerting a great deal of effort to be heard and understood by them.
What follows is a strategy I’d like to share with you:
Four: Gaslighting. Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse and manipulation in which the perpetrator lies, rejects, and invalidates what you think you know about the situation to back up their own skewed story. Narcissists twist facts, downplay relationship crimes, and leave out significant parts of the truth, convincing you that they’re not guilty while making you doubt your reality. The point of giving you false information is to make you question your memory and what you know to be true. Any harm they cause is made to look like they didn’t mean it or didn’t know what they were doing.
Narcissism is all about changing the past to make things better for themselves and reminding people that they are wonderful.
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