6. Empaths and people pleasers tolerate mistreatment for too long. If you’re an empath or a people pleaser, you tend to rationalize mistreatment. You tell yourself, “Maybe they didn’t mean it.” But narcissists rely on this mindset. They push boundaries little by little, testing how much you’ll accept before you finally break. That’s why instead of leaving, you try harder, giving narcissists exactly what they want: unlimited chances and no consequences. But here’s the ugly truth: the longer you stay, the harder it gets to leave. Narcissists are experts at keeping you trapped, love-bombing you when they sense you’re pulling away, blaming you for their bad behavior, and making you feel guilty for even thinking about leaving. As trauma therapist Shannon Thomas puts it in her book Healing from Hidden Abuse, “Toxic people don’t change; they just get better at manipulating you into staying.” You might believe that if you just endure a little longer, things will get better. But ask yourself, “How much mistreatment is too much?” Because if you’re waiting for a narcissist to finally respect you, you’ll be waiting forever.
7. Empaths and people pleasers are less likely to expose the narcissist. Narcissists target silent-type victims. They know you hate drama and would rather swallow your pain than create a scene. So when they lie, manipulate, or mistreat you, they assume you’ll stay quiet, protecting their reputation while destroying your peace. You don’t want to hurt anyone, so you keep their secrets. You downplay the abuse and convince yourself that exposing them will only make things worse. But in reality, your silence is their shield. The truth is, narcissists don’t fear losing you; they fear being exposed. They thrive in the dark, where their manipulation can’t be seen. But the moment you speak up, their power starts to crumble. As Dr. Leslie Carter, a psychologist specializing in narcissistic abuse, puts it, “Toxic people rely on your silence to continue their games. The best way to beat them is to stop playing.” You don’t have to start a war, but you do have to stop protecting someone who would never do the same for you. Because at the end of the day, keeping their secrets won’t bring you peace; it will only keep you a prisoner.
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