Now, watch closely, because the next move is rewriting the past. Suddenly, the narcissist becomes the wounded one. You were unstable, you were ungrateful, you were always the problem. This isn’t memory; it’s make-believe. They rewrite the script, cast themselves as the victim, and put on a show for anyone who will listen. But it’s not about truth; it’s about survival. The narcissist can’t admit fault because doing so would collapse their house of mirrors. So they twist the tale until it props them up again. It’s not about what you did; it’s about them needing to believe they never lost control.
Then comes the comparison game. They begin looking around—who else will give them that high they used to get from you? They pull in others, new sources of validation, but deep down, they are always comparing—not because you were perfect, but because you were familiar. You once gave them access to your soul; you once played along. So now they test their new trophies: Do they flatter me like the last one did? Are they easier to control? Do they challenge me less? And when the answer falls short—and it always does—they feel the knowing emptiness again. That’s why they so often return to the old, the ones they once broke, because it reminds them of a time when they still held power.
But there’s something even deeper that haunts the narcissist more than silence. It’s the thought that you see them clearly; that behind all the masks, you glimpsed what they try so hard to hide. Maybe you didn’t scream it, maybe you didn’t fight, but you knew, and they can’t shake that. So they wonder, “Have you moved on? Are you warning others? Have you grown strong without them?”
Because here’s the thing: what truly terrifies the narcissist isn’t that you forgot them; it’s that you healed, that you found your voice, that you reclaimed your joy, and that you might never look back. Let me tell you something: when you break free from a narcissist’s hold, it’s not just escape; it’s resurrection. You come back from the dead. They tried to bury you, and you rise—not bitter, not broken, but wiser, braver, softer where it matters, and tougher where it counts.
If you’re in that sacred place now, of reclaiming your heart and rebuilding your life, keep walking. Don’t look back. The storm behind you may howl, but you’ve already outgrown its reach. When the narcissist sees you rising, there’s something that rattles them to the bone more than silence, more than absence—it’s your rise. It’s watching someone they thought they buried sprout back up with fire in their soul and light in their eyes. Make no mistake, they see it from the shadows; from a distance, they watch. And what starts creeping in isn’t love; it’s revenge. It’s the fantasy of a comeback. The narcissist starts dreaming of a day when they’ll show up again, all polished and proud, as if to say, “Look what you lost.
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