When you distance yourself or go no-contact with a narcissist, their reaction can be surprisingly intense. Narcissists are known for their shocking behavior, but when you step back from the toxic relationship, especially for the first time, the backlash can be even more dramatic. Though breaking away is a healthy and empowering choice, navigating the fallout can be challenging due to the narcissist’s destructive tendencies.
But even before that, in narcissistically abusive relationships, silent treatment, stonewalling, and ghosting are common manipulation tactics embedded in the abuse cycle. Narcissists can give you the cold shoulder, use silent treatment, stonewall, or outright ghost you—and that’s okay in their minds. But if you ignore them, it’s against their rules. That’s their classic “rules for thee, but not for me” mindset.
In any relationship, stonewalling can feel like the emotional equivalent of cutting off someone’s oxygen. The silent treatment is a passive-aggressive behavior where a toxic individual communicates a negative message to their target through nonverbal means, often only recognizable to the perpetrator and the target. It goes unnoticed by others, which works perfectly for the narcissist.
To be clear, this manipulation tactic is used to maintain the upper hand in the relationship. When a narcissist gives you the silent treatment, it is meant to devalue you, send a clear message, and hurt you deeply. They want you to feel invisible and worthless. Furthermore, it also serves as a way to manipulate and control you. The primary purpose of the silent treatment is to provoke an emotional reaction, forcing you to try to win back their favor, attention, and approval.
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